Monday, August 1, 2016

6 Months of Matt-moo

*sigh* This kid...aside from being in that adorable, chatty, toe-sucking Gerber stage, he is just amazing.

How did he become 6 months old?  Six months was an eternity in fertility treatments and yet, it seems to be going so quickly now.  I love it, cherish it and hope that my Matt continues to allow me to snuggle him for a little while longer.  "They are only little once..." is pretty much the theme to my parenting.

He reaches for me now, and that my friends, has sealed the deal. Any doubts about how I was doing, who I was to him, and even genetics...GONE. *POOF*.  The only thing that matters to Matt is that I reach back for his outstretched arms, and believe me, I do every.single.time.

Seriously, I didn't think I was having any issues with the egg donation situation, but now I understand how it simply doesn't matter. I get it, now.  Those little hands pointed toward me make my world go around.  He reaches out to me not caring about the number of genes we do or don't share.  He just simply needs his Mama, and that person is Me.

I finally understand what my mother meant about not understanding how much she loved me until I had kids of my own.  But, I also had no idea what it felt like to be loved back. The way his eyes light up in the morning, just because I'm there.  The way he smiles those gummy little smiles. I am just smitten. Those things are the superglue that put my heart back together after so many disappointments.

Seriously, to think I could have missed out on this over my stupid ovaries, I cannot even imagine living out my life with never getting to experience this. It makes my heart hurt even more for my sisters in infertility.  I hope they know how hard I pray for them, and that I don't take any of this for granted.

We enjoyed having him with us at the beach.  He loved the sand and the water. I think I do have a little water bug, which is exciting to me, because I loved water as a child. He just kicks and bats his hands while smiling. Super cute! Maybe he'll be a swimmer?

It is serious work shoveling sand up your bathing suit!

The eating thing is going okay.  We are still super into puree's and not much for the baby lead weaning thing.  They need a lot more dexterity than Matt has at this point. I still hand him chunks of stuff to suck on or chew on, but he seems to choke when he manages to get it in his I'm like "NOPE".  So I continue to make his baby food purees and for the most part he seems to like it.  Especially bananas!

We are seeing glimmers of his personality.  For the most part, he's pretty chill about new things, places, people.  He is, however, busy. Very busy.  And he still makes up his schedule on the fly, and I don't understand.  Sometimes he'll take 15 to 20 minute naps and crash all night, other times he'll take a 2 hour nap and party like it's 1999 from 3 am on.  He's so much fun to play with now.  He loves to do whatever you are doing.  He finds new features on my phone everyday.  He loves books, especially their taste.

He also loves his pets. Unfortunately, the feelings aren't quite mutual yet.  Emma does like purees so when one goes splat, that is a help, but she doesn't really associate Matt with those yet.  Matt loves to "pet" aka grab with baby vice grip the kitties and Emma.  Emma just gets her feelings hurt and runs away looking at us like, "how dare you let it hurt me?" Lucifer is kinda like "oh, crap" but yet his curiosity keeps him coming back for more.  Gaius is actually the most "warm" or lazy...however you want to interpret it.  He just looks at me like "how dare you let this disgusting floor troll touch me. I will show both of you by standing my ground!" None of them have shown the slightest bit of aggression which is surprising because, you know, cats.  But Matt is just infatuated with everything they do...and the cats are a bit fascinated with him.  But until Matt can be trained to open a can, he's somewhat useless to them.  Emma licks Matt because she gets positive attention for it.  We know, Emma.  You aren't fooling us...

"I earned this vacation!" 

First time eating carrots.

Matt Facts:
Weight:  16lbs and some change on our scale
Height:  Itty (we couldn't get in to see his pediatrician until 8/8 for his 6 month appointment).
Fave Toy:  Sophie the Giraffe is taking a slight lead which is better than Tim the Lazy V-Tech Truck Driver who stops to make friends while on the job...Don't worry, we tell Matt that isn't realistic.
Fave Comfort Item:  Any of his WubbaNubs, and Mama
Fave Food:  Boob Juice and BANANA!!!
Fave Book:  The one in his mouth.
Least fave food:  Green Beans are Yuck!
Teeth: No teeth...I saw them on a 32ish weeks ultrasound, so I'm pretty sure they are there...
Future Occupation:  We've gone from teeth to an interest in noses as well, so I'm thinking otolaryngologist.

Peace, Love, and Sand Monsters,

Mary Katherine & Matt

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

5 Months and Some (BIG) Change

There is a huge picture window at the end of the hall I work on.  So every time I walked down the hall while I was pregnant and saw myself with an expansive belly I'd just smile like a goober.  So now, with everything except my boobs back to normal, I am still overwhelmed at my reflection...there was a baby and now there IS a REAL baby! And now my baby boy totally flashes these uber goober smiles at me all the time.  Nothing but gums, cheeks and squinty eyes.  And I am so in love...

I can't believe Matthew (Matt-moo) has been with us for 5 months.  It is still so completely surreal.  I would never wish infertility on anyone, but I wish you could see Matt through my eyes.  He's an absolute gift. I cherish him maybe a little bit differently.  I don't take any moment with him for granted because he shouldn't be here.  I am so blessed.  There is just a level of appreciation and gratitude that I know I would never have had if I'd "just gotten pregnant".  He is my miracle.  He's amazing.  He's MY son that I honestly never knew I would have.  I think that's the first time I've said that...'My son'...I have a son, and he is just the best thing that's happened to me since BJ.

But I do think it is different.  Like a second chance at life, only a deeper gratitude for the ability to parent.  So when he's screaming bloody murder, I ALWAYS, ALWAYS whisper "I love you" into his ear. I hate that I can't fix his problems, but I'll always be there for him.  And I feel so privileged to get to be the Mama that tries to soothe him. The level of adoration I have is intoxicating.  I can't wait for that next snuggle, that next tuck of his head beneath my chin, and that moment he lets his body relax in my arms.  I'm just love-drunk over this baby.

BJ had his first father's day with Matt, and it was awesome for me.  I think I liked it better than Mother's Day.  I don't have to feel like the reason BJ will never be a father anymore for one thing.  And Matt's a pretty sweet baby.  We went out to eat with BJ's parents and just enjoyed each others' company. It's nice to feel included in these parental unit celebration days!

Matt also stayed with his Mimi and Papaw for a weekend.  They did great with him, especially my niece Makayla...who probably has better baby skills than I do.  She is just devoted to His Royal Mattness, and I just love watching them.  Seriously, if it weren't for child labor laws, she'd by my #1 choice for live-in Nanny.

So Matt at 5 months wants to stand ALL of the time.  He's of course nowhere ready for that, and his feet still don't touch on the exer-saucer w/out pillows, but we do manage.  Meanwhile, I'm seeing some more definition in my biceps.  When he allows you to bend him at the waist, which seems less frequently than other babies of similar age, he can sit with minimal support. And he rolls all of the times. You put him down on his tummy, he's on his back, you put him down on his back and he's on his tummy. You put him on his side and he's confused for a few seconds before figuring out which way will be the way you least desire him.

He's also decided he is ready to eat.  I dropped a cracker and he went to town on it.  It was a saltine and it was the last thing I would have wanted him to have, but then I thought well, hell, baby-lead weaning and all that jazz.  So he ended up slobber-dissolving a 1/3 of it.  The goal had been 6 months of exclusive breast-feeding, but he had all of the physical milestones down if not super-ceded.  He's a pretty neat eater for a baby.  He doesn't spit stuff out, so I guess he was ready.  As of now he's had avocado and sweet potato prepared by me. I wish cooking for adults was this easy. Peel, Steam, puree, DONE... I still think it's fun to spoon feed a baby. Matt wishes I'd let him have the spoon, but he just gags himself on it...So while I can, I'm just gonna stick w/the puree's.  I'm sure we'll convert to more baby-lead weaning as his dexterity improves, but for now, I'm enjoying this...and I have nearly 70 servings of pureed baby foodsicles in my freezer...

So Matt Facts:

Height: Wee (Haven't measured him since 4 mos...)
Weight:  According my scale he's just over 16 lbs...
Fave Food: Boob Juice w/sweet potato a close second
Fave Toy:  Sophie the Giraffe has taken over...much to the disapproval of dogs EVERYWHERE. "Why is that bald puppy chewing my toy?" They say with their eyes while simultaneously expressing betrayal and hurt.
Fave Comfort Item:  Mama and the Wubbanubs are on equal ground right about now...
Teeth:  None, but I'm hoping I didn't create an infant Tylenol addict over nothing.  He's been fussy, drooly and finger chewing off and on for a week, but I can't feel anything....Isn't that teething?
Future Career:  Dentistry.  He's currently giving free dental screenings to whoever allows him to stick his fingers in your mouth.  *Please Note that this should not replace your biannual dental cleanings and exams at your preferred, licensed dentist.  Matt hasn't been to preschool, yet, nor does he have a firm grasp on English at this point...He will have a firm grasp on you lips, so do be prepared...

Peace, Love, and Gummy Smiles,

Mary Katherine & Matt

Sunday, May 29, 2016

That Phone Call...

A year ago, yesterday, I laid in bed quietly crying into BJ's shoulder awaiting "the call".  The same
one I get every single time.  The one every infertility patient dreads because you just know.  You know 'it's not meant to be', 'it just isn't your time', 'maybe you should look at other options.'  You sit there and let all the comments and "helpful advice" run through your head and you wait.  You wait painfully, tearfully, all the while simultaneously begging for just a little bit more time being the most pregnant you've ever been.

You've changed your diet, your lifestyle, given up your savings account, stabbed yourself with gargantuan needles and bargained with God to just help you get through the cycle no matter the outcome because you've convinced yourself you've given up on your miracle.  You tell your partner you just aren't ready to hear the bad news.  You wonder how many people the phlebotomist told about the crazy girl that sobbed through her venipuncture because you were "not ready to hear bad news".  

All this emotional, medicinal, financial and spiritual investment is pent up in this one phone call.  As you bury your face into your partner's shoulder your phone begins to go off.  You contemplate not answering it, because if you don't know just yet, you get a little more time with that precious embryo or two.  Just a few minutes more loving that should be baby you've poured your soul into.  Just a few minutes more pretending your miracle has come, and that you don't have to hurt like this anymore.

But you know.  Deep down, you know, so you answer that phone call.  "I'm so sorry, Mary Katherine..."  That's what you always hear....I can't tell you how the rest of those phone calls go because all the air is sucked out of your lungs, and you don't know how your shattered heart continues to beat. You look at your partner, your face scrunches in pain, the air is stolen from your lungs, yet you muster a "thank you" to whoever has the burden of telling you what you already knew.  Telling you your greatest fear has come to fruition.  You feel the searing pain of your heart breaking.  It feels like the air you manage to suck in is 1,000 degrees Celsius.  You hang up and you don't know whether to scream, curse God, or just let yourself waste away since it feels like all the important parts of you died with that embryo.  And that embryo was everything...

You know all of this pain is waiting for you as soon as you hit that green button on your phone.  But you do it.  You do it because you are brave.  You do it because you have to start the healing process.  And you do it because despite knowing the answer, there is a tiny, tiny voice in the back of your head that thinks 'just maybe'.  The one little part of your spirit that evades the protective wall you've convinced yourself you've built. The thing we call hope...

That wonderful part of your spirit that just can't be broken no matter the beatings it takes.  The hope that gives you the strength to endure another month of heartbreak.  Another month of telling all the people who knew what you were going through that it did not work.  Another month of convincing yourself it was worth it. Such a tiny, tiny voice, yet the one that gives you the drive to put yourself right back in the same position, waiting for the same phone call all over again. 

Because sometimes...miracles happen.

"Mary Katherine, have you gotten your lab results?" 
"Well, you're pregnant."
"No I'm not."
"Yes, you are pregnant..."

And your entire world changes with just 3 words...

James Matthew Roberts, thank you for being my miracle.  Thank you for being my little embryo that could.

Peace, Love, and Miracles,

Mary Katherine & Matt

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

4 Months!!!!

My little Goober is 4 months old!!!

He's such a sweet little guy, and I can't imagine life without him.  He's cute as a button, darling, smiley and very curious about what is going on just outside of his bubble. As in please move me so I can see what's going on over there, ok now back over there, ok I don't want to be here, either...I'm really just Matt's minion, but it's the best job in the world.

He laughs...this deep, almost can't tell he's not grumbling laugh, and it cracks me up. His hair seems to be blonding up and he's still got these gorgeous blue peepers...
He drools like a champ.  He smiles like a cherub...He's simply just the best.  I look back and cannot imagine not having him.  I am soooo lucky, so blessed, so thankful to be this baby's Mama!  I just want to drink in every precious thing about him all day, everyday, but alas...that doesn't put much food on the table.

Matt is thriving on the boob juice.  He's 14 lbs 7 oz at 4 mos and 2 days.  He's 24.75", rolls from front to back in either direction, and rolls from back to side if there is a chance that my boob is a magnet.  If i'm not there, there is no desire to roll in that direction...I mean why do more tummy time when that is the actual worst thing in his life, right now?  He can sit in his Bumbo seat, and LOVES to stand up.  He was a total champ at the doc's today.  Toe prick and he didn't even flinch, cried only a little bit when he got shots, and nursed right away.  He's meeting all his milestones, and we are pretty impressed with him. He's loving the 25th percentile.

I'm trying to learn how to balance motherhood, wifedom, working, and being a grind when it comes to studying.  I'm mostly flailing, but somehow (thanks mostly to BJ) things get fed, loved, we have clean clothes, and our house isn't in total least my definition of shambles...which means we don't count Emma Grace tumbleweeds...

BJ and I are starting to get questioned about what our family building plans are which I guess is always a natural curiosity.  We'd love to have more children, but we want to put our efforts into raising Matt at the moment, and maybe finish a graduate school program or 2...or 3.  I want to love on just Matt for a bit. We will never get to relive his babyhood, or toddler-hood again, and I'm not sure I want to miss any of it because I am jumping back into the vortex of infertility.  I can't imagine missing such important milestones because I'm crying myself to sleep over not giving him a sibling...which I'm pretty sure if I could explain the concept of sibling to Matt right now, he probably wouldn't be up for it, anyway...I'm not going to let infertility steal my time with the baby I do have right now.

Nothing is guaranteed for us, so we don't know that this will even work the next time.  That's another reason I want to relish every single moment of Matt.  Even if we go back for more children, doesn't necessarily mean we will get them.  So BJ and I have been asked "Why would you put yourself through all of it again?"  Well, we wouldn't be exactly.  We've gotten over the hurdle that tripped us up the most. We have 14 snow babies waiting on us to decide what to do, in fact we just paid their tuition for Freezer U.  Other people have commented on my/our age... Yes, I'm an older first-time mother, thanks for reminding me on the daily, but I'm not the oldest, and though I will most likely be over 35 the next time, I would technically not be an advanced maternal age patient because all our embryos are the same age as Matt. Anyway, I just love it when people ask me what our plans are then scoff at us.  If you ask and don't like what you hear...just remember they aren't your plans, they are mine!

Matt Facts:
Weight:  14 lbs 7 oz.
Length: 24.75 inches
Favorite food:  Boob Juice!!!
Favorite Toy:  We've moved on from Eric the Horse to this little Atom model looking thing with lots of tubes that he can stick in his mouth (Thanks, Mamaw Theresa!)
Favorite Comfort Item:  Any of his 3 Wubbanubs.
Favorite Activity:  Standing - nothing he can do by himself, of course :)
Favorite Pet:  Lucifer...even if he tries to kill Matt, he's the most interested in his ongoings and occasionally snuggles with him, if even on accident.
New Skills:  Standing (w/support), laughing, putting things in his mouth, sitting up w/support, mastered head control, and finally mastered only took 4 months!!!
Predicted Future Occupation:  Journalist...must know everything that's going on around him when we are in public.

Peace, Love, and Savoring all the moments,
Mary Katherine & Matt

Friday, May 6, 2016

Dear You Don't Think You Count, Mama

Dear You don't think you count, Mama,

First let me wish you a Happy Mother's Day.  Because indeed, you do count. You are a mother.

You know what it is to sacrifice everything for your child that you do not even have yet.  You know how to sacrifice financially, emotionally, and even spiritually.  You've sacrificed your body with large bore needles and drugs that cause bizarre side effects.  You've sacrificed your dignity with every other day transvaginal ultrasounds. You've sacrificed your sanity, because when everything is telling you it won't work, you have to try one.more.time.  And you know grief like no other.  You've grieved month after month for the child that will not be.  You've grieved the 2nd pink line that faded too quickly.  You've grieved the baby whose heart remained quiet.  You've given birth to a sleeping angel.  Or you've lost your baby way too soon. Yes, Mama, you've got grief covered better than most mothers.

You are nailing all the most difficult parts of motherhood, and yet have not received a single reward.  No tiny hand has gripped your finger.  No beady eyes have stared back at you.  No tiny lips have curled into that oh, so sweet smile.  No little bellies have quivered with baby giggles at your provoking. You are not even awarded for the amazing amount of fortitude you demonstrate when you get out of bed each morning. Yet you do and you keep going. And for that you deserve mother of the year!

I had a hard time accepting that I counted as a Mama before I had a living child.  But I tell you, the 5.5 years it took to get here are way harder than anything I've faced being Matt's Mama.  Even the witching hour when I cannot do anything to soothe Matthew is not nearly so hard as getting out of bed the day after you find out your last treatment cycle did not work. Yet people are eager to wish me a Happy Mother's Day now. With Matt, I know we'll live through the night and wake up to a smiling, cooing baby.  With fertility treatments there is so much investment with no guarantee of anything.

And yet, no one dares wish you a Happy Mother's Day.  Well, I do.  I wish you a Happy Mother's Day and pray that your healthy little one finds its way to you very soon.  I honor your journeys and think about you every single day, not just on Mother's Day.

So again, Happy Mother's Day to you, for you have given of yourself more than most parenting mothers. I send my love and strength as you continue on with the spirit cancer that is infertility. Battle on my friend.

Peace, Love, and Remembering ALL the Mothers, 

Mary Katherine

Friday, April 29, 2016

National Infertility Awareness Week 2016 #StartAsking

Nearly 6 years ago, BJ and I decided to throw our hats in the race to parenthood.  I had no clue, that it would be the beginning of the most tumultuous period of our lives.  I, probably like many young women, had no clue that getting pregnant would or could be difficult.  My mother conceived easily, so I assumed that I would, too.

But here I am over a half decade later with my first child who is not even 4 months yet. A child that took 4 IVF cycles including 2 donor egg cycles on top of multiple tests.  What happened?

What happened will probably never be totally figured out, but I should have been more aware that problems conceiving were not some rare curse reserved for career-driven women that put off having children into their forties.  In fact, I should have been aware that age was not the only risk factor for infertility.

I grew up in the south with mostly an abstinence-based sex-ed program.  My biology classes in my small hometown high school always skipped reproduction.  I think my health teacher spent 20 minutes glossing over a menstrual cycle sometime when I was in 8th grade.  By the time I started my period, I "knew" almost everyone had some cramping or discomfort with their period, but it shouldn't keep you from missing work or school - that's a little subjective, don't ya think?

So instead I spent month after month in high school gritting my teeth, sneaking ibuprofen in my back-pack, and tearfully praying that this would not be my life for the next 30 years.  When my mom caught me pacing while clutching my heating pad to my abdomen in the wee hours of the night did I finally land in my pediatrician's office.  His answer, was along the lines of "all girls cramp to some degree" just take ibuprofen right before you start your period.  He didn't ask how bad, how long, or even what I was doing to manage at that point...and neither did the next 4 health care providers...Including a Women's Health NP, and 3 OB/GYNs...NSAIDS and birth control. So by the time I saw my current OB/GYN, I just glossed over my cramps like all the other health care providers glossed over them.

Birth control did nothing, but taking ibuprofen helped if I started taking it before my cramps set in.  Problem being that while I had periods almost every month, they were very irregular (first of one month, 25th of the next, 15th the month after that...).  So my physical activity was blamed.  It wasn't for another 13 years, that I understood how important the hormone balance that creates regular cycles were to the whole conception process.  I just thanked God for sparing me that month from the ridiculously painful "normal cramps" I had.

It may have made no difference in the long-run, but I will always wonder if the lack of treatment I got for endometriosis lead to the demise of my ovaries, and therefore my ability to conceive my own child?  I didn't ask, and worse, I didn't even know what to ask.  At some point the not asking turned into not advocating for myself, either.

Fortunately, once I accepted that infertility was my plight in life through no fault of my own, I was able to #StartAsking.  I started tracking my cycles, researching, and figure out that I needed help if I wanted to have children.  I found a medical team and plan that ended in a healthy pregnancy and a beautiful bouncing boy.  He's just the best thing, ever.

Conceiving a child is supposed to be this simple process that you don't really talk about.  And that works just fine for 7 of 8 couples...but for 1/8th of us, it's a confusing, maddening, heartbreaking and lonely process.  And when it doesn't simply happen, it becomes super-complicated.  You need to #StartAsking, you need to advocate for yourself, and you need to know you are not alone.

Peace, Love, and #StartAsking,

Mary Katherine & Matt

Monday, April 25, 2016

3 Months - There will be blood.

Wow...we...BJ and I have a 3 month old baby.  He's just a treasure. He's a messy treasure, but he is OURS!!! It's still so much to take in and process that this little, giggling, smiling and cooing nugget is mine.  He might even call ME, Mama...for at least a while before my complete adoration of him drives him away from me.  *SIGH*

Did I mention I love him?

So anyway, the raising Matt saga continues... After no improvement on my second round of Diflucan I went back to a lactation consultant. She immediately said his tongue and lip were way too tight. She went through everything that it would cause, including Matt's pulling off behaviors, screaming at me, gassiness, restive behaviors at the boob...not to mention all my symptoms.  So I decided at nearly 3 months of age it was time to see a local oral surgeon that performs many frenulotomies.  She said that sooner we got it corrected the better.  I read where after 4 months the procedure is almost pointless as far as improvement for breastfeeding, because the babies become pretty set in their feeding habits.  So I made an appointment for the next day.

The next day also happened to be my first night back at work...I worried that I should wait, and I was torn about the doing it done as soon as possible. So with our future in mind, I went ahead with it even though I had some concerns about not being home with him.  When we saw the surgeon he completely agreed and said Matt would experience difficulty with speech as tied as he was and wanted to move forward with both his upper lip and tongue-tie. He explained it would be bloody but that it would stop within 4 minutes and even sooner if he nursed.  They handed me a surgical towel, a couple of 4x4's and tell me in not so many words to get my boob out.  I think the surgeon is just getting his placement when all of the sudden Matt is screaming bloody (literally) murder.  He absolutely could not and would not nurse for almost 10 minutes.  I pulled out a couple of pinky (my pinky)-sized clots.  They left me, but kept checking on us every couple of minutes. Matt was basically inconsolable and I just felt like total serious mom-scum.  When he finally latched, it wasn't any better than usual but I was getting major red-faced side-eye.  After about 20 minutes, the bleeding was down to a very slow ooze and way more drool than blood so I decided to pack his little self up and get him in the car.  The doctor said everything looked normal and really the total amount of blood didn't seem that horrible, but I had no clue how much he swallowed, so I just went with it.

By the time he got home, he was his pretty light-hearted self...even if he looked like a dhampir when he smiled...

He was a trooper.  So I left him with BJ and my mother as back-up support and headed to work that evening. The idea that BJ would do all the baby care but be able to rely on my mother for back-up and not text me so I could focus on work.  I was slightly concerned when by midnight I did not get any texts or a little after 2:00am I am admitting a patient to our floor when my Apple Watch goes off and it's my mother...*SIGH*..."Don't panic, but we are on our way to the emergency room with Matt."

Suffice it to say that after 3 cumulative hours of pressure, Matt was still actively bleeding, and we probably did need to know that he had enough blood left in his pipes.  So pretty much my first shift back ended up as a total bust, but Matt was a little trooper and fell asleep in the ED. So while no major baby milestones crossed...I guess we have the parenting milestone of taking your kid to the ED for the first time covered. *SIGH*

My parents took temporary custody (I'm joking) for 3 days, this past week, so I exclusively pumped and I was feeling pretty good.  But my little muncher in 2 sessions or less had my boobs pretty angry.  Oh, well...We followed up with Dr. Pickett and a lactation consultant today.  He already had a little re-growth on his tongue which Dr. Picket was able to stretch back out.  The lactation consultant was pleased with his latch except for the turned in upper lip.  He's just going to have to grow into it.  He's done great weight-wise, all things considered.  Her advice to me was keep pressure on the back of his head so he doesn't pull off and twist as much, and....use nipple shields - WTH... I'm throwing my hands up in the air with this one and just decided I'll use them when they're sore, but how funny.  I feel like if I'd just used them the whole time I could have saved myself a lot of time, frustration and money....doh! But those plump cheeks are SOOO worth it!

Speaking of milestones...We think Matt has the rolling front-to-back thing down pretty well, but we cannot be for sure.  Our Emma disGrace gets a little jelly and thwarts progress by lying down beside him on the side he's rolling toward.  She is utterly ridiculous...I mean it would be cute if she'd at least pretend to be concerned about him, but nay.  She just wants to make sure we know she can roll front to back, too. [Good job, Emma!] *SIGH*

Matt's spending a little time in his Bumpo...we got the wrong one...the one for 6 month-old babies, apparently.  But he seems to do fine as long as he's entertained.  He's tired of being on his back all the time, so I try to prop him up more.  He's a happy little fellow, we think...though his facial expressions when in public would have you believe he's pretty disgusted. I've told him he's way too young to be this skeptical of everyone.

Matt Facts:

Weight: 13 lbs, 9 oz.
Length:  ??
Favorite food:  Mama's Milk
Favorite Toy:  Drogo the Dragon and Eric the Horse
Favorite Comfort Item:  Wubba-nubs
Future Occupation Prediction:  Going by his judgemental/skeptical facial expressions, we think he's headed toward the seminary at this time.  Father Matt...


It's National Infertility Awareness Week.  If you have 8 friends chances are you know someone dealing with infertility.  Reach out if you know someone and tell them you are there for them.  Hug them, let them tell your what they are going through without offering advice, and be supportive.  In just those little things, you will do more for them than they could ever ask.  Prayers going up for everyone still in this battle.  BJ, Matt and I send all our love, prayers and good vibes.