Yay, last one of those! Soon the real fun shall begin! Now it's time for my prolactin to rebound! (Hence, the bromocriptine rebound cycle.)
As I've mentioned before, I'm having a lot harder time being all gung ho about this cycle, and my acupuncturist even got on to me on the matter. I had been interpreting his Zen wisdom as he thought we should try naturally for a while longer. I asked him what he thought I should do if this cycle fails. He looked at me strangely and asked me why I was there.
Duh! I was there because I'm trying to make me better for a pregnancy now. Not next time, not a year from now, but now. It goes back to my control issues. I told my acupuncturist I had to have a plan B (technically, we would be on plan G) to help cope with a failure. He said, "Ok, plan B is for you to decide what to do after plan A,". Did I tell you I loved my acupuncturist?
I asked the same question to my husband the night before. (Like I said, I'm having my doubts...) Lately, I've been happy. Granted the door to parenthood is far from closed, but I haven't had time to think about it much because I've been so busy. It's taught me that I can be happy (at least when I'm crazy busy) despite all of this. I've enjoyed the last few weeks of fertility pressure-free bliss. I am truly as happy as I've been in a long while. I have a great husband who has a great job, a great job, myself, with three amazing co-workers, a great dog (well, we're working on it) and last, but far from least, some great friends. Oh, and cats...we have cats.
So happy, that I had an inkling of fear that maybe, if this doesn't work, we should think about the hideous word "child-free." So, as I said, I asked BJ what he thought we should do should this cycle fail. "Let's get through this cycle, first, and then ask Dr. Donesky, but I want to be a parent."
I do, too. So I've finished one prescription and ordered $4,200.00 more drugs. Monday morning, I have a suppression check to make sure my ovaries have shut down appropriately. They'll draw my blood for an Estrogen (E2) level, which we want to be under 50. We are looking for no cysts on the ultrasound and 16+ antral follicles. Antral follicles are our potential. They are where the eggs will mature. Starting with around 16 gives us a great chance at having an optimal number of eggs to work with (20ish).
If everything looks good, then round 2, here we come! I believe in Dr. Donesky, and I believe in our decision. I want this to be the ticket. I want this to work, please. I want to spawn!
In the meantime, please pray, meditate on, send vibes to my blogger role-model, Tamara. She's in the worst part of the process...the wait. Tamara, I'm thinking about you tons and can't wait to hear your good news!!!! Xoxo (Oh, and check out her blog...it's amazing! Awkwardlysocial.com)
Peace, love and rebounds,